Sailing Down The Mainstream

It’s that time again! Recap of another crazy weekend with my Bombs brothers, this time joined by our friends from Denmark - Kjurious and Zoo Me Now, who we toured with in DK and the UK last year. Many beers were drunk, laughs were had and for yours truly a booze blackout like never before. Read on below for the low-down.

Bootleg Social, Blackpool (02.10.15)

This weekend had been anticipated all year, the day we could meet up with some of our best friends and play some killer venues whilst blowing audiences away. What better way to start than in our home town of Blackpool at a new venue called Bootleg Social. This venue was frequented by the Bombs for years under the previous guise of Jenx, which I’m told was like a spaceship on the inside due to being decorated in metal and mirrors (I wasn't there for this period of Bombs history, too busy trying to remember my periodic table and geometry in high school), It was a trip back in time for the guys. Originally the gig was meant to be at the Blue Room but alas it has succumb to the curse of Blackpool and closed its doors for the final time meaning we are out of a rehearsal room, recording studio and regular gig venue. On the upside it meant the gig was held at a better venue with better beer and much more room to move... WINNING.

After finishing work and getting home in double quick time I was greeted by my Danish friends whom a rundown of characters is featured below:

Ulrik – Vocals and guitar and the nicest man on earth.
Kasper - Guitarist and the biggest drinker of the lot and that's quite the achievement, also the loudest laugh in the world.
Rasmus - Bass player and youngest of the group. Has an eye for the women, even more so than myself.
Jacob – Drummer and the quietest member but equally as crazy as the rest of them.
Peter – Roadie who sounds American when pissed for some reason. Formula 1 fan and one hell of a funny guy.

Zoo Me Now
Kim - Guitar and vocals. The only founding member remaining from the band I saw last year. A huge bundle of energy on-stage.
Kenneth - Guitarist who I thought looked like early 90's Layne Staley.
Marco  -Bass player who towers over all who stand near him.
Sami - Drummer and veteran musician of the band. Once roadied for Kiss back in 88 when they stopped off in Finland.

We all exchanged handshakes, hugs and stories of what we had all been up to since we last saw each other in late 2014. Then, we smashed some gourmet burgers and free beer that the venue had set aside for us (this led to my eventual downfall later on) whilst awaiting the first band Dischord, who for regular readers will recognise as the leading light of the Blackpool punk scene and lovely people to boot. They were typically high energy and delivered a killer set which also involved me fucking up the chorus when singer Chris threw the microphone in my direction towards the end of the set - Class and Cuffi (from CSOD) ripped the living shit out of me for the next hour or so.

Zoo Me Now were up next and surprised us by having revamped the whole set from bouncy skate punk to more straight up rock n roll which I personally think will see them right in the future (these guys share the same record label as the Bombs – Holier Than Thou, check them out via spotify, youtube etc.). Next up was CSOD who had just returned from a rehearsal tanked up on rum and intent on making a racket and causing chaos once again. The set was a familiar one with only the GWAR classic ‘Sick of You’ replaced by ‘Vlad the Impaler’ also by GWAR (they quite like GWAR in case you hadnt caught on yet).

…and that, I’m afraid to say, is all for now folks. Yes, that’s right, the demon booze got the better of me and I’m sad to say I can't remember a damn thing from this point onwards in the night. I’d waited a full year to hear Kjurious play songs like ‘Anxiety Lullaby’ and ‘Power of Nature’ live again. From what I’m told I ended up slumped over my merch desk, promptly falling sideways and smashing our merch box into a million pieces - much to the dismay of many of my friends and associates that night. I also missed the debut of the Bombs new track ‘Mainstream’ to which I’m told went down a treat. Further hilarities ensued when Class asked me how much merch I’d sold to which I replied "50 quids worth". When asked for said 50 quid I handed him 86 pence. His response was "Where’s the other £49.14p Kal?", at which point I apparently nearly broke down and kept telling him how sorry I was for letting him down time and again.

Joey further had to put up with me when, after he insisted I go home which was situated about 3 minutes-walk from the venue, I responded by saying "nah dude I’ll just sleep on your couch", this wouldn't have been a problem had it not been 10 minutes in the wrong direction and him having a toddler to take care of - not a too far-gone 22 year-old rocker who was still picking pieces of plastic out of his back. I can report that Joey wasn't the only one who felt the wrath of drunken Kal, as I spent 5 minutes outside the venue asking Gibbons what country I was in and didn't stop hugging him for the whole duration. Also, Damo had his very expensive and temperamental amp-head dropped when I was trying to help them shift gear, apparently it came some six inches off the ground then promptly dropped with me going straight down with it.

Next thing I know I wake up in my puke covered bed wondering how the hell I’d got there. A quick call to Class confirmed the worst. Ulrik had also been very concerned about me and Scott had to drive me home at about 3.30am (cheers guys). Still, no time to turn over fall asleep and get mad at myself - we had another gig to get to, this time way up in Sunderland. In my defence, my dad and granddad are called Wayne and Garth – how could I not party on!

Corner Flag, Sunderland (03.10.15)

Scott and JG picked me up feeling like death three times over. Thankfully they told me my comrade in drinking Damo was a bit pissed himself the previous night and had fallen asleep stood up in another bar (the Galleon) after they departed Bootleg. He appeared out of his house looking paler and more Twilight vampire rip-off than usual which cheered me up to no end. Class was picked up last looking the freshest of the lot and the wise decision was taken to give ourselves the hair of the dog treatment so Cobra lager and shit Sainsbury’s sandwiches it was for the weary five.

The trip seemed to take forever for some reason but at least we had DJ Class to entertain with hits from Gluecifer and other cool bands. There was another stern talking to for me about not drinking too much at gigs and not hitting on every female in a 15-foot radius. When we pulled up at the venue I received a hero's welcome from our continental comrades who said they had not seen anyone so drunk that they had forgotten which country they were in (I blame their presence, couldn’t suss out if I was in England or Denmark).

The venue on this night was the Corner Flag Sports Bar which is a huge place kitted out with tons of sports memorabilia. Again, this was a late replacement gig as the original all-dayer at the Sanctuary in Burnley had been cancelled. We’d played it earlier in the year, but with our local fan base having abandoned us to attend the Aces High Festival in Nottingham we knew this would be the quietest of the three gigs.

Kasper, Jacob, Rasmus and I ventured out on the town for a while to buy fags which wouldn’t have been a problem if they hadn’t been like dogs on heat, whistling at every scantily dressed leaflet chick that stood at the various venues of Sunderland. Sods law that the only women who stopped and talked to us were a couple of swamp donkeys in their early 50's, seemingly allured by the boys heavy accents whilst I just stood aside and made sure they weren't lured off into the night by the aging predators. We arrived back in the venue half way through the Bombs set which was ablaze with rock n roll fury, all of them throwing shapes and moves like its 1987, Johnny giving us a master-class in backing vocals (overshadowed Class a few times, this will annoy him greatly).

Next up were Kjurious who reminded me quickly just how great they are with blistering leads paired with soaring vocals, a kick ass rhythm section and tons of moving about. Truly awesome, I can’t wait to hear their debut album and I hope you all go and give it a listen when it’s released. Zoo Me Now seemed a lot more in their stride on this night with even more moves being pulled out the hat, Kim bouncing around like Tigger on Ecstasy and, all in all, delivering a killer performance. On a side-note their best known track ‘Die for Me’ is so much cooler played with this line-up.

With Scott sat impatiently in his car waiting whilst the rest of us drank with the Danish boys (they have a built-in fridge and coffee machine in their van, we don’t even have a fully functioning CD player in our car) the conversation turned to next year and plans for all three bands to hit the road again for longer periods. Although, an enforced beer limit would have to be placed seeing as we would all come back yellow with cirrhosis otherwise. With this in mind and excitement high for the final trek down south of 2015 we were homeward bound with ‘Dust’ by Screaming Trees being spun loudly. Next stop – SHITSVILLE, London!

Fighting Cocks, Kingston (04.10.15)

The Sunday morning started without burned-out body and broken mind (good lyrics there, someone write a song) so was already a huge improvement on my last wake-up. Scotty was swift in picking us all up and the usual tour diet commenced of cheap lager, cheap smokes and ever expensive sandwiches... oh and some salt for Gibbons (there is a reason I call him Uncle Salty, the guy carries a carton of the shit to add to his sandwiches and crisps, I’m surprised we haven't caught him in the bathroom snorting a gram of the stuff yet).

We made the now regular trip to London (seventh time this year) in record time with classic Blackpool band and early Bombs tour-mates UFX on the stereo. A long-winded discussion on which Backyard Babies album is the best ensured. Apart from Class saying the self-titled, we all agreed it's ‘Total 13’, although ‘Making Enemies is Good’ is hugely underrated. JG committed a cardinal sin by saying the self-titled one ain't that good and ‘Saved By The Bell’ is a shit song, he got told to behave by myself and Class for his foolish insolence.

By now the Freaky Naughtiez had perked up and must have been irritating the others as when we reached the servces we saw a family who had a cage for the dogs built into the car-boot - JG commented “we should get one of the them for when these two mong-tards start getting loud we can throw them in there”. This didn’t dampen the freaky naughty spirits as Damo started taking selfies of himself, then the two of us together to send to his good lady back home. She got in on the act and replied “can I just ask who is sucking who off first?”. Tracy if you’re reading this you just about won the internet that day.

We rolled up and met our Scandinavian homies for what was to be the last time of the weekend. With sound-check quickly underway at the Fighting Cocks, which has been so good to us the past couple of years, the venue started filling up nicely with the regular Southern Senton fan-club. Zoo Me Now were up first that night and were amazing, best they had been all weekend. Tight as hell with Kim going crazy at the end and diving into the crowd ending up on his back soloing as fans were jumping and moshing all around him.
The sad part of the night came next for Kjurious as three days of drinking, sleeping in a van and singing his ass off caught up with Ulrik. After three songs he had to cut the set short as he could barely talk. A huge shame for them but the previous two nights had been amazing performances but it won’t be the last time we tour with them that’s for sure. Next up were the Resuscitators who are local lads and had vastly improved their stage presence and live performance since last year when they played with us - a band I hope we play with again. Mocara were next and for someone who isn’t a fan of ska music they were killer, so upbeat and tight as hell with awesome saxophone work. Even Gibbons was smiling by the end of it and that doesn't happen at all, so well played to Mocara for turning our usual sour-faced six-string slinger into a happy, smiling, Trilby wearing bundle of fun.

Bombs were headlining tonight and dude… this was the best gig they have done in a long time. The reception was just unreal, mosh-pits from the first tune and chants of lyrics that drowned out the vocals at times. Scott spinning sticks so much Tommy Lee would be jealous, Damo throwing shapes and posing for cameras, JG playing solos like his life depended on it and Class with grit in his voice like he had been drinking whiskey and taking bon- hits from a car exhaust for the past three days. They truly brought the house down and when Jackals arrived it was pandemonium with the guitarists in the crowd, Danish people going crazy alongside our English maniacs creating so much electricity in the atmosphere you could power the amps from it.

Merch sold like crazy and gear packed up pronto, we all poured into the bar for much needed and deserved beers after which we commissioned Bombs fan Steve, who had been the main snapper that night to take a huge group shot off all the bands, roadies and fans who were in attendance that night. This didn’t sit well with the barman who informed us we were being far too loud and rowdy for half past midnight, Sunday night in a residential area (blame the Danish I say).

Sadly we had to say our goodbyes to fans and crazy Danish lads which was a huge shame. Promises were made that this wasn’t the last time we would all meet, heavy hearts aside the trip back was made swiftly with various Southern Rock bands dominating the airwaves and excitement growing knowing that in a week’s time it’s going to be Tot Ziens to England and Goedemiddag to the Netherlands. Can't wait! My next blog will get you up to date on the happenings over there, so many things to ponder - will the crowds like us? Will the women like me? Will I get accosted by hookers like I did in Denmark? Will JG smile? Will Scotty giggle? Will Damo get drawn on by Class whilst sleeping?
Who knows, but whatever happens, remember there is NO REST FOR THE ROCKIN'.